OFF THE VINE: Super Shek plans US invasion after conquering Asia

<p>He's more powerful than a locomotive, faster than a speeding </p><p>bullet, can leap over buildings with a single bound and has been known </p><p>to bench-press 300lb gweipors. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>Yes, its Sssuupppeeeeerrr Steve, the 007 of the media industry, who has </p><p>shaken and stirred a legion of fans since his arrival in Hong Kong 10 </p><p>years ago. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>By day, he is the shy, unassuming Steve Shek, advertisement manager of </p><p>The Economist. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>At night, he is Slick Steve, the brylcreemed Lord of Lan Kwai Fong. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>The bizarre story of this dual-personality British-born Hakka superhero </p><p>began in one of his dad's restaurants in Berkshire, where, at the tender </p><p>age of 15, he was appointed bouncer and tasked with tossing out </p><p>disgraceful, braying, English, chinless twit drunks. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>The fact that he now works with them has not escaped anyone's </p><p>notice. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>Moving right on, The Economist in Asia has broken all advertising </p><p>revenue records, thanks to the capable team led by Olly "Brigadier </p><p>Flashman" Comyn and his trusty lieutenants Rupert "Underpants" Harrow </p><p>and Super Shek. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>Other records have also been seriously challenged: </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>- How much Totty can Super Shek cram onto the Economist junk? Is there </p><p>such a thing as a Totty Plimsoll line? </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>- Is it possible to be "just good friends" with such an alluring array </p><p>of Totty? Were the words, "whoops I slipped" ever uttered while Super </p><p>Shek applied the suntan lotion? </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>- How much Totty does it take to lick a creamy birthday cake off Super </p><p>Shek's chest in a Lan Kwai Fong bar? </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>Now, to the agonising symphony of hearts breaking wide open all over </p><p>Asia, Super Shek is setting sail for San Francisco - where little cable </p><p>cars go skyward to the stars, and great big hairy poofters in leather </p><p>biker outfits eat diminutive Chinese boys for breakfast. </p><p><BR><BR> </p><p>Good luck, Steve, and Bon Voyage. </p><p><BR><BR> </p>