Diary: Stories we could tell ... Close encounters of the weird kind

We've had some frankly astonishing choices, topped by M&C Saatchi's Richard Tunbridge in this very issue - he chose Salma Hayek, although Diary suspects his interpretation of 'play you' is rather different from ours. We've thus compiled a selection of our favourites (i.e. most grounded in reality) and are inviting you, dear readers, to send your vote to [email protected] for your favourite, uuhh, coupling. And in 10 words or less, create a tagline for their movie - the winner will get a festive bottle of plonk, as will the ad person with the most votes.

By the way, we'd just like to note for the sake of accuracy that Addison James was never featured in On the Spot, but his uncanny likeness to Supersize Me's Morgan Spurlock could not go unmentioned. And seeing as we run this joint, we're bending our own rules and including him in the running to be crowned Pretender of the Year.

Results revealed in January!